The more I seek Him...the more I find Him

So I was sitting on my prayer couch today, reading the Bible. Let me just admit here, that since we've been here - I have spent a LOT of time praying (which is good), but not a lot of time reading scripture and my Bible. I tend to do that - I get focused on one aspect and drop another... So, since its a quiet, overcast day here, and the boys are watching a new movie, Trinity is sleeping - I felt God calling to me to spend some time learning ABOUT Him, not talking TO Him. (I am speaking to myself here!) Anyways, I found a flyer in my Bible that I have no idea where it came from.... (Hmm... Erin, think maybe it was GOD!?) :) It was on Key Apostolic Intercessory Prayer ... again, no idea where I got it from.
It sent me to Ephesians 1: 17 - 20. "I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of Wisdom and revelation, so that you may know Him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which He has called you, the riches of His glorious inheritance in the saints and His incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of His mighty strength, which He exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at His right hand in the heavenly realms." (Italix added by me). As I read this over and over today, it struck me - the SAME power that rose Jesus from the dead is the SAME power working in me. I don't know about you, but I've never come close to having enough power to raise someone from the dead (Physicians come close maybe)... Trust me, if I could have made someone raise from the dead, I would have done it when Alexandra died. I begged and pleaded with God to make her just suddenly gasp for air and do a miracle..... and as you know, nothing in my person made that happen. Yet, the power to do that is running through me.

It doesn't seem 'graspable' to me to find or have or use that power... yet God has clearly said He wants us to find Him and know Him well enough that we realize He is working through us with that same power. I don't know where I'm going with this, only that it seemed to knock me on my butt today. I know I desire the wisdom and the revelation that Paul is speaking about, as well as the knowledge of how GREAT, FANTASTIC and amazing the power of God is. I've been a christian for 14 years now, and I feel like I'm only scratching the surface of what I should know by this point.

Again, maybe God has drawn us here to Georgia, to draw us 'away' for a while, so that we can find a new side of him. I don't have friends calling for playdates everyday, I don't have our weekly women's bible study... so instead I'm having to rely on just God. Maybe that's the way He wanted it.... I have so much yet to learn, so far to go, but I'm so glad He hasn't given up on me yet. When God sent us here, He sent me this other verse, "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him." Psalm 37:7 ... If you know me, you know I don't sit still too often... but maybe that's why He sent us here!